The Depths
Have you ever struggled to just go there with God?
He wants to accompany you to deep places. He wants to show off His knowledge of your uncharted territory. He wants you to take His hand and join Him in the promised land.
But we know that this means going deeper. We know this means opening our heart like never before, again. It’s scary. The follower of Jesus experiences this moment time and time again. When they must choose to jump off the cliff, when they must fall, and when they must dive into uncertainty at the chance of grasping clarity.
The depths of God can sneak up on you like that. You are minding your business, following the clear path He has set for you. You are in step with Him. Suddenly the trail ends. And you look up as He gently gestures toward a steep edge. “No,” you think, “This can’t be right.” He returns your dismay with a gentle nudge. “No,” you say, “we were really heading somewhere. There was something tangible, sensible at the end of this path. We were making progress.” Another nudge. “No one will understand. I can’t make sense of it.”
And yet, His eyes always compel us to take the leap.
Recently, God prompted me to take a leap into understanding more about how I love others. He wanted to show me lies I had been believing and broken ways I have chosen to relate to others. Needless to say, I was trembling as we peered over the edge of this cliff. I was terrified of what I would find. But I remembered who was with me and we jumped.
He revealed where so many of my fears were holding me back from loving people as He intended. I saw how I had let comparison run rampant, stringing tripwires through my mind and heart. He cleared brush that had built up and bullied me for too long. Again, I realized that life with Him is formed in the depths.
It isn’t easy. It feels like putting a Lego set together in the dark. It doesn’t matter that you can’t see, that you don’t even know what you’re making, because He is with you. You’re building blind with the King.
When you feel frantic when you start to fumble, ask yourself, “Have I forgotten?”
Have I forgotten how I got here, who is with me, the end of the story?
As you trust Him, you gain sight and strength in the depths. He is the benevolent source of it all, and He sees you, as you are and as you will be.
Soon enough, you are back on the path. You are taking tangible steps. You are ‘making progress,’ maybe more efficiently this time.
Soon enough, the path ends, and you feel His gentle nudge once again. Jump. See more of Him and more of who He made you to be. Go there with Him. “The Clearing” by Amanda Cook so beautifully expresses her experience of this process. My favorite line says,
“I could make my bed so many places I have been, but you said I was meant for more.”
The deep places are certainly uncertain, completely counterintuitive, and absolutely terrifying. Follow His gaze, hold tight, and jump anyway.
